Specialness
We all want to be seen, heard, understood, and appreciated for who we are. We want others to notice our talents and skills, intellect and experience. It feels good to be respected for our uniqueness and special qualities, yet this can also have the opposite effect when it is forced and unrelenting. When, for whatever reason, we do not feel singular and distinctive by someone or a group, we often tend to become someone else for the sake of acceptability. This can be tricky because in truth this is misleading at best and at worst disingenuous. Teaching ourselves to lean on another person to make us feel exceptional is synonymous to self-denial and covert self-sabotage. As a result, our true specialness remains hidden from view.
Question
Here is the big question each of us must ask ourselves when at different times in life we don’t feel special and scoring low on the confidence and self-esteem scale. How can we see and appreciate specialness in others if we don’t know what it feels like within our own mind, heart, and being?
Ownership
Distinctive specialness runs through our body naturally and automatically, like blood running through our veins. And to make our distinctions known to others, it mustbe infused with humility and generosity of spirit. When we truly believe in and accept our specialness - a belief that requires no one else’s validation - the desire to be viewed as special by anyone other than ourselves is weakened. Supporting and encouraging ourselves feels right and good because we know it originates from modesty and goodness of heart. Moreover, when we take gently defined ownership of our specialness, we move closer to self-actualization; the work we were born to do.
Modesty
It is our job, and ours alone, to determine what makes us distinctly special. It is also important to value and honor our irreplaceableness. Believing in our own true specialness with modesty and generosity of spirit is the way we humans become better at being human.
“Humility makes our distinctiveness not only quietly noticeable, it makes our specialness more readily acceptable to others. ”